Archive for March, 2013

Playing grown up was fun


Yes. For two weeks. I pretended to be an adult. With one of those morning job things and all. Been going to baby sit at 5 am for a few hours each morning, then errands. Then home to cook. Then bed.

Fun. But, YAY that over. I can resume hiding in my bed.

J/k. I wish my life was for reals spent sleeping and cuddling.


I should open a buisness “cuddles by the hour”



I REALLY need to stop this falling for people who are either un interested or live clear across the USA.

Heart? Come in heart. This is brain speaking. You need to cease and  desist IMMEDIATELY.



I suppose the nice(?) Thing is that i dont have a hard crush on someone.

But. I miss that shortness of breath feeling. The heart pounding. Dizzyness.

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Again – Word for word. What was sent.

On the day of the XXth of March, Sunday we will be finishing up an event in XXXXXXX and would like to meet with you that evening for dinner.

I do not appreciate in any way that it is felt to be “okay” to continue to demean my family. Ill speak towards my husband, and directed at my girlfriend, is not welcome.

In the last letter we sent you, it was stated that respectful discussion would be allowed. However, it has not been respectful, so at this time I wish to ask you to cease discussion about such topics.

Continuing to push personal religious views onto my family, with threats of hell, and not going to heaven is not okay. If you would like to disagree, please use things not based on a “religion” and use actual, proven scientific facts.

These tactics are not respectful, and I ask that they cease immediately.

Continued actions are simply going to further alienate our family now and in the future.

Relationships between my family and yours are already VERY broken by such actions. I would hope that a part of you would want that to change. ”

Summary? Apparently the option to never speak to us again was chosen.

That references being a girl (Hold up though, I will admit, I have been accused of this. once. recently. I didnt intend on it to happen. This post is about being a tease on purpose) But I am going to talk about a male.

This kid has a motorcycle. I have a weak spot in my knees for bikes. Riding them with attractive boys.
So, This kid, also, Knows how to turn me on. In the way, that if there was a near by brook closet, I would use it.

We have a pretty large amount of sexual chemistry, but nothing has ever become of it (and TBH might be weird from the moment on that it did)

BUT – Revving a person up, in a public location, in a mater of, 30 seconds, because you know how? not cool. It is a jerk move.

Its more jerkish, when you do it on purpose.


So, Either man up, and put out. OR STOP DOING IT OVER AND OVER



So, I figure by now, you all just figure I have a perfect happy la de da life? Well, pretty close to it.

Except for a few things. I have maybe touched on them, but maybe not. So, today, I will address them. They suck, they are ugly. However, we all have something locked in our closet.

Here it is in blunt terms. I feel like the most unwanted person. Ever.

Now! Before you get all huffy, and start yelling at me about how THAT ISNT TRUE (Because, being good readers, I am sure you root for myself and my family. I root for all your’s.) Let me explain!

Five years ago, I met Bugg. Five years ago, I Became ‘The issue’. Its an issue that they refer to by my given name. you know, Me.  They did until about two months ago at least. Now I am ‘the wife’. (yeah. I lost my name privileges.)

Three years ago, I got married. I bought into the biggest lie of my entire life that I have EVER been told. I was looked in the face by my mother in law and told “I am glad you are going to be in our family.”

Since then? I have become ‘the wife’.

I want desperately to be liked. To be valued as a member of the family. For her to pull out a picture and say “this is my daughter in law. She is a smart and artsy girl” and be proud. To not be pushed under the rug like an embarrassment.

An embarrassment. I feel like that to them.

I wish they saw what CxD and Bugg saw. What you all see.

A person who loves life. Loves art and my family. Is a die hard book nerd. A feminist who likes to blog. A person with ideas that dare challenge thoughts and social norms.

Hair in dreads! Bugg and CxD seem to think its dorable cause its puffy and ‘you look like the mad woman you are!!’

We are all mad here….